Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
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woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
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I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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