I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
