He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
