True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
