She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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