im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
