omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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