Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
