I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
