Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
