So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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