That's when you crack a 10am beer
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
