and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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