Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
