i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
there is glitter all over my balls
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