i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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