? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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