Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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