Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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