I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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