I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize