My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
