i was born a porn star she said
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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