I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize