I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
