I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
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It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
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I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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