He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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