I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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