your parents love me but you hate me
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
