went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Randomize
