dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
