I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I think I just shit out all my problems.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
