ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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