I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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