we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize