You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
