Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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