Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
