I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Randomize
