At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
