I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Randomize
