i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I don't deserve a penis
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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