Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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