girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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