Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
a search helicopter?!
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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