come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize