no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
