I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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