I wish I could punch you in the face.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
