so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
found the other keg... it's in the tree
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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